Seriously, How Productive (Useful) Are Staff Meetings?

Tuesday, staff meeting - Thursday, ITIL process owner’s meeting & semi-annual admistrator’s meeting - Friday, ITIL Configuration Management meeting. One meeting after another, all which typically accomplish absolutely nothing. Attendees often bicker, argue, fail to remain on topic, and worst of all, consume my precious time. Other than venting, there’s really not point to this post, but perhaps someone will relate and have something to contribute. Here’s a list of my theories as to why meetings even occur.

The Meeting About The Meeting

This type of meeting is the most obnoxious and uneventful duration of time that could ever exist. They often start with someone in middle management who has a meeting with their manager, or managers, in the distant future. In an effort for the middle manager to prepare their contribution to the upper management meeting weeks ahead, a meeting about the meeting is held. Staff are called in to discuss what’s going on with Topic A, how can I convey Topic A in relation to Topic B. “Hey Joe, did you goto Disney World last weekend? aaawww, how was it?” Oh, right - back on task. We’re having a small meeting to prepare for a big meeting that’s preparing for a bigger meeting. When does the cycle end?

The Meeting To Look Good

Managers will typically try to make themselves look good by appearing organized, tentative, and even concerned about the organization’s productivity. The reality is, it’s all an act. One minute a meeting about weekend activities and other miscellaneous nothingness, the next minute, what’s the projected completion plan for the deployment of some customer’s demands. Why the sudden change? The boss’s boss walked in. What a joke.

What Can You Do?

Absolutely nothing. These meetings are destined to take place so don’t fight the inevitable. Instead, think about your own projects, write code for the next myspace, or whatever. Just don’t fall into the loop. People at work don’t like me because I don’t personally relate to their boring lives, but they admire me for the level of professionalism I exert when dealing with business operations. These meetings wouldn’t be so bad if genuine interest in service delivery was the main topic of interest, but more often than not, nothingness is what seems to matter the most.